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At first I thought it was a Distell allergy thing that saw the pips from the Grape communal blog AWOL from the Nederburg Auction two weeks ago. Not a bowtie in sight; no Mr. Min aerosols; no sparkling gnashers and gnarly toes and even the Queen of Woolies Takeaways was absent. But the great disappearing trick was repeated today at the CWG Auction with not a pip in sight and the only Platter potentate I saw a sober and soberly dressed Christian Eedes, looking more like a Nedbank Brackenfell branch manager than a former enfant terrible of SA wine writing. O tempora! O mores!
CWG Auction this morning - a shortage of pips
Well the 100 ladies have spoken and here are 100 wines they chose for ten occasions. A fascinating mixture of big brands and boutique labels – a people’s Platter, if you will.
“No matter what Simon Barlow [seigneur of top-draw Stellenbosch estate Rustenberg] may say, we’re upper Ida’s Valley and he’s lower Ida’s Valley. [Banker and owner of Tokara] GT Ferreira lives in those trees over there – he’s on Ida’s Ridge” said Hans-Peter Schröder, surveying the valley from the stoep of the new all singing, all dancing wine cellar of Neil Ellis Wines where he is a partner. It’s a sort of Hemel en Aarde for Old Cape Money.
Hans-Peter
With 60 minutes to spare this morning, we stopped by Vaughan Johnson’s waterfront wine emporium for a realism injection. Vaughan was not happy. “July was our quietest month in 20 years. We’re in the depths of a serious recession.” Portuguese winemaker Aníbal Coutinho attempted to cheer him up with two bottles of Swartland wine he’d made, the Astronaut Chenin Blanc and Pinotage, both 2010 vintages.
Vaughan cast a suspicious eye at the labels through his Lady Gaga spectacles before taking us on a tour of the labels displayed in his shop. His conclusion? “Nothing is good.” Stopping at the shelf labeled hopefully “The Cape’s Best” he commented “You’d expect some decent labels here, but there’s nothing. The best packaging is Johann Rupert’s Cape of Good Hope Pinotage – it comes in a box which the tourists love – but that’s R200 a bottle.” “I thought you don’t like Pinotage,” I offered. “I don’t” he replied.
Vaughan Johnson and Hanneli Rupert-Koegelenberg last year
Is yesterday’s WOSA newsflash on the board’s bosberaad held on the 10th (two weeks for a newsflash which is still not up on the WOSA site is pushing it a bit, manne) the biggest piece of cant and hypocrisy in SA wine this month? Are we seriously expected to believe that “all agreed that the current positioning is on target” which presumably means endorsing the decision to financially boycott Vinexpo in Bordeaux this week – presumably to pay for Platter tasters to jolly down to South America on nebulous fact finding missions.
WOSA position paper from the bosberaad?
From this evening’s ABSA Port & Wine Festival dance at the Calitzdorp High School where the favourite tune was Groot Voël Paradys. Name the Platter taster being sent to a large South American wine producing country by WOSA (Wines of SA, the exporters’ association) on a “fact finding mission.”
An incredible admission from Michael Fridjhon, owner of the Old Mutual Trophy Wine Show in Business Day yesterday, that Spier, top performing winery at his show, would not make it to the Olympics. Just like the two top performers at competing tourney The St. James Top 100: Saronsberg and Cederberg. Incredible, as it undermines the whole raison d’être of wine shows. It’s like Sepp Blatter admitting the best team doesn’t win the World Cup.
“Nice” is one of the most powerful adjectives in the winespeak vocabulary. So it comes as no surprise to report that James Middleton, youngest brother of Princess-to-be-tomorrow Kate, has registered the company Nice Wine in the UK.
James Middleton by Andrew Crowley in the Telegraph
Andy Hadfield, of Real Time Wine fame and Brett Garner of Winelands lifestyle freezine The Month, have a lot in common. They’re both preppie thirty-somethings with a compellingly simple idea [CSI] and they’re both married to GPs. Andy’s CSI was to let ordinary wine drinkers submit reviews in plain English to a trio of social media platforms: a blog, Facebook and Twitter, dethroning the groaning superstructure of self-appointed pundits with hideous gnashers and calloused feet who control the current crop of wine guides. Lord Beaverbrooks of the Bottle, if you like.
Brett Garner and Elunda Basson
The latest update from the controversial Top 100 SA Wines jamboree implies that at least four big names will be entering: Simonsig, Rijk’s, Constantia Uitsig and Hartenberg. Dummy pages from the Tops consumer guide could spoil breakfast for litigants at the Old Mutual Trophy Show as well as trouble the Friday siesta of Platter publisher Andrew McDowell. Although they did give me a giggle when I saw the Rijk’s Pinotage is made from “Pinot” while the Pinot Noir in the Simonsig Cuvee Royale Brut Blanc de Blancs is abbreviated down to “Pin N” and there I was thinking a Blanc de Blancs was 100% Chardonnay. Pinheads as sub-editors – a nice touch!
The Guild of Sighted Guides was already rocked by news of a 140 character-per-wine hardcopy guide from youthful, dynamic social media-ist Andy Hadfield whose “blue steel” pose straight out of Zoolander contrasts favourably with Jacobim Mugatu from Old Mutual. With the majority of SA producers sitting on the fence, the grass is suddenly starting to look greener in St. James and a stormloop of late entries for Tops is expected.
