Now that the Weekender has folded, thank heavens WOSA (Wines of SA, the exporters’ association) is moving increasingly into publishing. Their empowerment book Ithemba: 15 years of democracy: an update on transformation is brilliant (even if the format a bit unwieldy), Belgian sommelier Guido Francque is in SA at the moment busy with a book on SA wine routes and the scheduled book of braai recipes (“created by local winemakers to match their wines”) promises to be a winner. I need to find out how producers are selected as I’ve already received an invitation from a Hemel en Aarde winery chosen to showcase such indigenous delights as “butternut cous cous (sic), roasted Mediterranean vegetables and steamed new potatoes with béarnaise sauce.”

My own chapter calls for papwors to be expertly grilled by braaimeister Emile Joubert over coals of 50 year old Lemoenfontein bosstok Pinotage. Red made from these venerable grapes will match the meat end of the papwors while our award-winning Bukettraube will complement the pap end. A true and terrifying terroir experience.

Papwors

Another outlet for WOSA’s publishing urge is to commission a city guide as part of the Hg2 series of travelogues. As the Hg2 website puts it: “Hookers, gambling, K holes and group sex – read all about it! Hardcore, huh? But hold on. Gratuitous decadence is not the only path to pleasure. This anthology of 75 such paths adheres to the spirit of Whatever Works for You, be it simple pleasures or guilty pleasures, the thrill of rebellion or the thrill of religion. The unifying principle is simply the very great importance of pleasure itself. So come on – smoke a cigar! Get off on altruism! Throw a fancy-breast party! Whatever you choose, live life – before it’s too late.”

It is a scandal that Riebeek-Kasteel is not included in the happening destinations already covered: Almaty & Astana, Marrakech and Tallinn.

Emile Joubert, possible editor of Hg2 Riebeek-Kasteel

Hg2 guides offer advice on how to:

Disgrace Yourself
Use Poker Skills for Life
Eat Lobster in a Warzone
Rule Like a Drag Queen
Handle a Hooker
Get High on Yoga
Blag Your Way Backstage
Skive for a Salary
Infiltrate a Cult
Stage a Protest
Be a Star
Join the Jet Set
Sweet Talk the Cops
Survive Prison
Cook with Cannabis
Pick a Horse in the Paddock

SA can hardly claim to be among the first rank of wine tourism destinations until it has its own Hg2.

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